Post by dramatichottie001 on Apr 17, 2006 23:09:52 GMT -5
Title: What We Want
Author: Tabitha
Rating: PG13-15
Warnings: angst
Characters: Fred/Angel
Summary: Fred and Angel try to understand their situations with one another.
Disclaimer: Fred and Angel aren't mine, and neither is 'Damn, I Wish I Was Your Lover' by Sophie B. Hawkins
Dedication: To my two best friends Lauren and Chad
/That old dog has chained you up alright
Give you everything you need
To live inside a twisted cage
Sleep beside an empty rage
I had a dream I was your hero/
Every night she dreams about him.
She can’t help it, sometimes she tries to fall asleep thinking about fish, well maybe not fish but anything that isn’t him would have been better. She can’t get the image of a hero out of her head, she can’t escape his penetrating stares he knows so much about her, to much.
He wants to comfort her, tell her that the monsters don’t live here but he can’t, things used to be simple before she came into his life. The only woman he had ever loved was Buffy, but she was gone and now a brilliant, at times crazy, Fred filled his mind. She is sitting on the couch flipping through a book that Cordelia must have left in the lobby, he wants to understand her, wants to be with her.
/Damn, I wish I was your lover
I'll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I'll be your mother
And I'll do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won't feel ashamed/
Fred glanced up but her eyes don’t meet Angel’s. His face looks like its deep in thought. She doesn’t want to disturb him she never wants to disturb him. She looks back down and turned the page a picture of a beautiful blonde fell into her lap. On the back of the picture it says ‘I love you Angel, Buffy.’ That girl that died, she remembered Angel’s mood after he heard about her death, he was so sad, she was sure he didn’t sleep for a month, he was always in his room and only in the middle of the night did he leave it. She remembered walking into the kitchen at almost two in the morning and seeing him sitting at the table with his forehead touching the glossy wood.
She stared at the pretty girl in the picture, she would never be her, never be what Angel wanted. She stuffed the picture back into the book and tried to ignore the jealousy that flowed through her. Fred snapped the book shut and got off the couch.
/This monkey can't stand to see you black and blue
I give you something sweet each time you
Come inside my jungle book
What is it just too good
Don't say you'll stay
'Cause then you go away/
Angel could feel the emotion of envy flowing off of Fred, he wonder what upset her. Fred walked towards him and plastered on a fake smile. She set the book down by him and turned to walk away.
He glanced down at the book and sighed, the picture. “Fred, wait.”
She stopped at turned back towards him, “Yeah Angel.” Fred looked down and then back up, she didn’t want to look him in the eye. Because whenever she did it was hard to breath she loved him so much and she couldn’t once tell him how she felt, it was like a secret that she wanted to yell but had to contain.
He couldn’t just ask her what was wrong, “How did you like the book?” He got out from behind the counter and walked towards her.
“It was… it helped me understand the… the demon I needed to know about.” Angel reached for her hand but she pulled away and backed up. “I’m sorry for your loss, she was pretty, probably had a lot of friends, she probably smelt like vanilla and honey.” Tears swelled in her eyes she tried to will them away.
/Damn, I wish I was your lover
I'll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I'll be your mother I will
And I'll do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won't feel ashamed/
Angel could see the shine of tears glittering in her eyes and walked towards her, sobs went through her body and she shivered. He got close to her and Fred dropped her head to his chest, he wrapped his arms around her and rocked slightly. His head rested on top of hers. “Fred, you don’t understand…”
“Understand? Understand what, the fact that you’ll always be in love with her and that the only kind of care that you can find in your heart for me is a friendship?”
/Shucks, for me there is no other
You're the only shoe that fits
I can't imagine I'll grow out of it
Damn I wish I was your lover/
“It’s because I want more then just a friendship with you, I want to be with you, but I can’t. I wouldn’t be able to stand it if you got hurt and believe me you would. You have no idea what I am.” Angel pushed her away and she fell down onto the floor with a slight thud, “This is what I really am,” He shifted his face and looked down at her, he licked his lips slightly, “You deserve more.”
“Maybe I don’t want more, maybe I just want you.” Fred picked her self up off the floor and ran up the stairs to her room she slammed the door and slid down it. Fresh tears ran down her face. She felt like she could touch what she wanted but never truly have it.
/If I was your girl believe me
I'd turn on the Rolling Stones
We could groove along and feel much better
I could do it forever and ever
Give me an hour to kiss you
Walk through heaven's door, I'm sure
We don't need no doctor to feel much better
Let me in
Forever and ever and ever and ever.../
Angel watched her run, he wanted to run after her but what else was there to say. He cleaned up the hotel and walked up the stairs at almost one in the morning, by that time she was already in bed, tucked away safely were she couldn’t be hurt.
He watched her sleep, the slight toss of her body and the steady heartbeat her mellowed body gave off. He heard a sigh leave her lips and the cry of his name. Angel knew if he got to close to her he would fall deep in love with her, he couldn’t chance it, couldn’t chance falling into the hole of love and not being able to pull himself out.
Angel sat on the foot of her bed and let his hands touched the tips of her hips and run down her legs, she was so beautiful. So lost in her own emotions, but still so beautiful in sleep. He watched her most of the night, he saw her stir and decided it was best if he left.
He picked himself up and walked towards the door, with a slight snap of the door Fred opened her eyes and watched him leave.
/I sat on the mountainside with peace of mind
And I lay by the ocean making love to her
with visions clear
Walked for days with no one near
And I return as chained and bound to you/
Angel undressed and climbed into his bed, he eyes closed and he tried to figure why his life was so complicated, he had everything most people wanted but the one thing he needed was in the next room and she was untouchable. He was going to have to watch her slip away and end up with someone else when she belonged with him.
/Damn, I wish I was your lover
I'll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I'll be your mother I will
And I'll do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won't feel ashamed/
Every night he dreams about her.
Author: Tabitha
Rating: PG13-15
Warnings: angst
Characters: Fred/Angel
Summary: Fred and Angel try to understand their situations with one another.
Disclaimer: Fred and Angel aren't mine, and neither is 'Damn, I Wish I Was Your Lover' by Sophie B. Hawkins
Dedication: To my two best friends Lauren and Chad
/That old dog has chained you up alright
Give you everything you need
To live inside a twisted cage
Sleep beside an empty rage
I had a dream I was your hero/
Every night she dreams about him.
She can’t help it, sometimes she tries to fall asleep thinking about fish, well maybe not fish but anything that isn’t him would have been better. She can’t get the image of a hero out of her head, she can’t escape his penetrating stares he knows so much about her, to much.
He wants to comfort her, tell her that the monsters don’t live here but he can’t, things used to be simple before she came into his life. The only woman he had ever loved was Buffy, but she was gone and now a brilliant, at times crazy, Fred filled his mind. She is sitting on the couch flipping through a book that Cordelia must have left in the lobby, he wants to understand her, wants to be with her.
/Damn, I wish I was your lover
I'll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I'll be your mother
And I'll do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won't feel ashamed/
Fred glanced up but her eyes don’t meet Angel’s. His face looks like its deep in thought. She doesn’t want to disturb him she never wants to disturb him. She looks back down and turned the page a picture of a beautiful blonde fell into her lap. On the back of the picture it says ‘I love you Angel, Buffy.’ That girl that died, she remembered Angel’s mood after he heard about her death, he was so sad, she was sure he didn’t sleep for a month, he was always in his room and only in the middle of the night did he leave it. She remembered walking into the kitchen at almost two in the morning and seeing him sitting at the table with his forehead touching the glossy wood.
She stared at the pretty girl in the picture, she would never be her, never be what Angel wanted. She stuffed the picture back into the book and tried to ignore the jealousy that flowed through her. Fred snapped the book shut and got off the couch.
/This monkey can't stand to see you black and blue
I give you something sweet each time you
Come inside my jungle book
What is it just too good
Don't say you'll stay
'Cause then you go away/
Angel could feel the emotion of envy flowing off of Fred, he wonder what upset her. Fred walked towards him and plastered on a fake smile. She set the book down by him and turned to walk away.
He glanced down at the book and sighed, the picture. “Fred, wait.”
She stopped at turned back towards him, “Yeah Angel.” Fred looked down and then back up, she didn’t want to look him in the eye. Because whenever she did it was hard to breath she loved him so much and she couldn’t once tell him how she felt, it was like a secret that she wanted to yell but had to contain.
He couldn’t just ask her what was wrong, “How did you like the book?” He got out from behind the counter and walked towards her.
“It was… it helped me understand the… the demon I needed to know about.” Angel reached for her hand but she pulled away and backed up. “I’m sorry for your loss, she was pretty, probably had a lot of friends, she probably smelt like vanilla and honey.” Tears swelled in her eyes she tried to will them away.
/Damn, I wish I was your lover
I'll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I'll be your mother I will
And I'll do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won't feel ashamed/
Angel could see the shine of tears glittering in her eyes and walked towards her, sobs went through her body and she shivered. He got close to her and Fred dropped her head to his chest, he wrapped his arms around her and rocked slightly. His head rested on top of hers. “Fred, you don’t understand…”
“Understand? Understand what, the fact that you’ll always be in love with her and that the only kind of care that you can find in your heart for me is a friendship?”
/Shucks, for me there is no other
You're the only shoe that fits
I can't imagine I'll grow out of it
Damn I wish I was your lover/
“It’s because I want more then just a friendship with you, I want to be with you, but I can’t. I wouldn’t be able to stand it if you got hurt and believe me you would. You have no idea what I am.” Angel pushed her away and she fell down onto the floor with a slight thud, “This is what I really am,” He shifted his face and looked down at her, he licked his lips slightly, “You deserve more.”
“Maybe I don’t want more, maybe I just want you.” Fred picked her self up off the floor and ran up the stairs to her room she slammed the door and slid down it. Fresh tears ran down her face. She felt like she could touch what she wanted but never truly have it.
/If I was your girl believe me
I'd turn on the Rolling Stones
We could groove along and feel much better
I could do it forever and ever
Give me an hour to kiss you
Walk through heaven's door, I'm sure
We don't need no doctor to feel much better
Let me in
Forever and ever and ever and ever.../
Angel watched her run, he wanted to run after her but what else was there to say. He cleaned up the hotel and walked up the stairs at almost one in the morning, by that time she was already in bed, tucked away safely were she couldn’t be hurt.
He watched her sleep, the slight toss of her body and the steady heartbeat her mellowed body gave off. He heard a sigh leave her lips and the cry of his name. Angel knew if he got to close to her he would fall deep in love with her, he couldn’t chance it, couldn’t chance falling into the hole of love and not being able to pull himself out.
Angel sat on the foot of her bed and let his hands touched the tips of her hips and run down her legs, she was so beautiful. So lost in her own emotions, but still so beautiful in sleep. He watched her most of the night, he saw her stir and decided it was best if he left.
He picked himself up and walked towards the door, with a slight snap of the door Fred opened her eyes and watched him leave.
/I sat on the mountainside with peace of mind
And I lay by the ocean making love to her
with visions clear
Walked for days with no one near
And I return as chained and bound to you/
Angel undressed and climbed into his bed, he eyes closed and he tried to figure why his life was so complicated, he had everything most people wanted but the one thing he needed was in the next room and she was untouchable. He was going to have to watch her slip away and end up with someone else when she belonged with him.
/Damn, I wish I was your lover
I'll rock you till the daylight comes
Make sure you are smiling and warm
I am everything
Tonight I'll be your mother I will
And I'll do such things to ease your pain
Free your mind and you won't feel ashamed/
Every night he dreams about her.
, great stuff . 
